i hate mental breakdowns. i have now had two. oh joy. and i hate them for 2 reasons. one being, of course, that when you are suffering through one, you really ARE suffering. you cry and you hyperventilate and nothing ever works out and then you end up breathing into an envelope (we were fresh out of paper bags) with your eyes so swollen from crying that you look as if you have michelin man-itis localized to your eyelids only. and two being, that afterwards when you have regained your sanity (however small amount of it you had to start out with) you feel so stupid about the whole thing because you realize that it really wasn't that bad at all and that you were acting like an idiot and everyone else knew it. that's what i hate most. feeling so very embarassed to be such a wuss that you broke down over a stupid homework question. and so if any of you ever have to see me suffer through one of my episodes (great... i've already had enough for them to qualify as episodes.. or spells..) then just please pat me on the back and don't think me an idiot, because i can't help it.