still trying to find something to write about. i've already done a drama, a science fiction, a romance, my life story.... the only thing left would be either horror, but i'd like to be able to not worry about my feet so very far from my body all alone in the dark, or a mystery, but i'm absolute crap at those. besides, they're not my favourite genre. neither is science fiction i suppose, but well, it was a very good idea that one was. can't remember where i thought of it though. at any rate i'm rather stuck. i haven't been racking my brains for an idea either, but nothing has started forming as of yet. and i don't really want to pick up an old idea because of a few things. firstly because i started them so long ago, and my idea and writing style has changed then it would be very choppy when i picked up on it again. and if i didn't want it to be choppy i'd have to go back and re-work the entire beginning, which is long and frustrating and by the time you've finished that you've lost a lot of your original steam and then you write perhaps another 10 pages and then you stop once again and nothing comes of it... again. so i think a new idea is that way to go.

i had a rather unproductive day today. i actually slept until nearly 11 which is completely uncharacteristic of me. usually i'm up no later than about 9:30 or so. but i suppose my sleep need had been building up for a while. even though when i was with Aaron we never went to bed after 12:30. i hadn't been sleeping very well before that though. a bit of insomnia, which i usually have although not as bad as in the past. and then the first night i was at Aaron's house i woke up at 4am and couldn't get back to sleep which is completely unlike me. usually in the wee hours of the morning is the only time that i can actually get to sleep in the normal amount of time it takes for someone to fall asleep. when i read that the average person takes 7 minutes to fall asleep i couldn't believe it. i never used to think that i had trouble falling asleep, but thinking back, i can't remember a time when it took me less than a half hour to fall asleep. i thought it took everyone that long to fall asleep. it was only when it started taking me over an hour to fall asleep that i thought i had trouble sleeping. and i'm the only person in my family that has this problem. Hal falls asleep in about 5 minutes or something ridiculous like that and my mum in about 3. i think too much is what it all comes down to. just cannot turn this brain of mine off.

i also have a bit of a journal type thing. and i was looking through it tonight and it actually starts in February of 2001 and i was amazed at how much things have changed since then. and not only situations, but myself as well. you never realize just how much different you are until you can go back and relive your own thoughts and feelings that were otherwise forgotten. most of me has changed somewhat. my outlook on life, my objectives and goals, myself.